My kids had an argument tonight and one made the other cry. Usually, I would just have the responsible party offer an apology and move on. But this time, I tried a more systematic approach:
1. I had the child who made the other cry say, "I am sorry for what I did."
2. The child followed with, "Do you accept my apology?"
3. The other child said, "Yes, I do."
4. Then I said that this type of behavior should not occur again.
5. To help ensure there would not be a repeat, I offered alternative actions such as counting to five when one got mad.
I am no Dr. Phil and the above method probably needs to change with the situation and the kid, but at least it attempts to be systematic and thorough.
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